Merry Christmas?

HAPPY HOLIDAYS!!!

Merry Christmas?  I'm not so sure about that.  Not to be bah humbug or anything.  It's just that if any of you know what it's like to have a blended family, then you'll totally understand how Christmas (along with all other holidays) tend to lose their excitement when your kids have to be shared with someone else.

Josh and I have been married for 5 years.  We have been 'sharing' our kids with ex-spouses for longer than that so you would think we would be pros at this by now.  However, even with a decree that tells how things should be done, things are RARELY done that way which causes a lot of tension and bickering on everyones part.  Not exactly what I would call the holiday spirit.  This year was supposed to be different.  This year felt pretty normal.  I thought I had it all under control.

This Christmas is our 'off' year with  the kids.  This means that instead of having them on Christmas, we will have them for New Years.  We have decided that on the years we don't have the kids for Christmas we will not buy gifts for them (by the time we see them on New Years, they've had 4 other Christmas's~another thing that comes along with blended families).  Instead, we have chosen to focus on memory builders on our off years.  This means that instead of gifts, we try to take the kids somewhere fun and out of the ordinary.  Something they will enjoy and remember instead of just stuff.

Personally, I have enjoyed this tradition and it makes not having the kids on Christmas that much easier because I know we will be doing something super fun, just a week later, and it gets me out of having to shop for Christmas presents!!

This year is a little different.  Ryson will be staying with us for Christmas even though it is his Dads year to have him.  This makes me sad.  Not because I don't want Ryson around, but because I've had to be the bad guy this year and tell Ryson he can't go to Utah.  Trust me, I have my reasons.  There is a LLLLLOOOOOOOONNNNNNNGGGGGG story and lots of reasons why he will not be going to Utah this year.  None of which I will be sharing.  I feel bad because Ryson REALLY wants to go see his Dad.  He misses him, that is understandable and one day he will understand why I had to do what I did this year.  Because of all of this drama, I have not been in the Christmas mood at all.  I have had a hard time even wanting to deal with Christmas.  I feel horrible disappointing Ryson and not being able to tell him all the details as to why. 

BUT~With the decision finally being made to keep him here, I feel like I can start focusing on Christmas.  I have a few days off of work starting today and I think the break will be very helpful.  I can stop thinking about all the negative things that are happening and re-direct my attention to making this a fun and memorable time for the three of us that will be spending Christmas together.  Good Times!!

This pic has nothing to do with this post.  I just thought it was hilarious!
MERRY CHRISTMAS!!!